It is so hard to say Goodbye…

 


It is so hard to say Goodbye…

 

 

17 Years…

 

9 Half Marathons…

 

9 Triathlons…

 

Countless, countless, countless miles…

 

Yesterday an era ended when I sent my original CamelBak home with my personal trainer.  I no longer had a bladder that fit it properly and my need to carry more water on the bike meant that after all that time it was time to say goodbye.  It shouldn’t be hard to say goodbye to a CamelBak, but it was. 

 

I struggled with the decision on Saturday.  It was hard for me.  I tried everything from forcing bladders that didn’t fit into it to trying to convince myself that I could use it later, but the truth was it would have just gone into the garage and taken up space.  It would have been just another thing that I couldn’t let go. 

 

So, I texted my trainer, Clayton, and sent him the same picture as above and said “I am gonna offer you something of mine tomorrow and I want you to accept it and take it and tell me you will put it to good use and you go do whatever you want with it.. like if you lost it in your dumpster, I just don’t want to know!”

 

Even as I type this now, I am overcome with great emotion.  Maybe it is because most people will never know what it is like to be a 460-pound athlete.  It could be all the blood and blisters that covered my feet while wearing that thing on my back.  The stories it could tell if it could talk.  Like our first Half in San Francisco and this nice teenage volunteer at the water stop filling it up with water for us and then me dropping it as I was putting the cap back on and as it slipped through my fingers, I bear hugged it and all the water left the bladder and covered the volunteer.  It can probably recount the Story of the Goose better than I.  It was there after all.  It was my brother, my confidant, almost a friend.  I know, I know it is stupid, but I can’t even begin to tell you how many times I counted on this thing to provide me with precious lifesaving water across endless miles and journeys.  You will be missed my old friend.  Go now and walk and travel with others who need you more.  Go then after all there are other worlds than these…  Just like there is a brand-new Billy b, there is also a need for brand-new gear to help fuel me to the finish.  The new Camelback I got is the same size but holds twice the load.  It is needed.  Just because you leave something behind doesn’t mean you don’t love it and it wasn’t special to you, sometimes you just must follow the will of KA and go… 

 

Clayton took the old friend and I do believe he will use it, or at least try to.  I think it has a new home and that makes me happy.

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